Having left my last day of class unattended on Friday, I’ve proceded to live a life of complete fabulosity.
I stayed in bed (in the sun, no less) all day with these things three:
- E.M. Forster
- leftover mulled wine
- Dean Martin
Surely the best combination. EVER. I punctuated Howard’s End with trimming my nails (yes, all twenty) - with the wine and Dino still, but also with the addition of my Raybans and a window open onto the sunny street. All of this, needless to say, in my skimpy new MacPherson Men’s hot pink trunks.
Freedom!
He is the Count and he luuuurrrves to count.
Additionally, he luuuurrrves to jump (especially at The Woodside), to take the A train, to not misbehave (and split infinitives), to grow accustomed to her face. But most of all, he luuuurrrves that anything goes.
And - b’god - can those jazzmen dress!
I bid on these on trademe when I was drunk.
And won.
They look even better on - très cute.
If you can’t tell, they’re grey loaferoids with maroon trim around the tongue. You might just see me in these on the town!
From me to you
A few gems of wisdom for the lady-about-town…
- If you’re doing it during the day, drink vodka. No tell-tale scent.
- If you’re like me and get very excited with your Maldon smoked sea salt, put half a potato into your too-salty pan. It’ll absorb the salt in a few minutes and you can season your dish anew!
- Don’t eat meat. It’s such an ugly thing to do. Do eat a Mediterranean diet of shallow-water fish, olives and their oil, red wine, few eggs, goat cheese and lots of fresh fruit and vegetables.
- Bubbly, then white, then red, then something sticky. NEVER bubbly after anything else. Bellini are a lie.
- Only wear a beige coat if your trousers aren’t beige. They should be black.
- Never wear too much plaid. You can’t wear too much tweed.
</arrogance>
It’s coming into winter, so it’s high time for more purple, I say.
These babies with (or without) anything and I’m a happy man.
IMAGINE there were no privacy in the world. Every day we’d dress, bathe, urinate, defecate, make love (okay so maybe not every day) for the benefit (read: detriment) of those around us. Every second a performance.
You’re right - it’s probably best not to think too much about it.
Page 1 of 2
